Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Dear Sister

This is going to be a quick one because it's 3 o' clock in the morning and I jumped out of bed to type this down.

Dear Sister.

I had a dream last night. Dream isn't as accurate a word I could think of right now but I'd rather that than deja vu.

It's five years in the future from now and you are newly wed. Perhaps been 6 months since getting married but so early on the cracks started to appear. Somehow I hear about your problem, your marriage problem, like all your problems that somehow always end up at my ears and it's not a good sign. Husband problem. But married already, how? Game over?

I could solve all your problems for you one by one in the ideal universe but in reality I have my own life to live too and I can't be the back up plan all the time. I can go and bash him up and fix the problem the hard way or the soft way but it's only a matter of time before another one crops up, no?

Best is if we could avoid all this problem syndrome altogether. Maybe that's the reason why I had that dream. It got me thinking about my stance towards this matter and envision my response if it was true. Like a needle, poking me with it makes me feel pain and react. No needle, no pain, no Jordan reaction.

I want to add something on top of all that passive thoughts. That you know, if we were half a room away like back then and not half a world away like now, I would want to tell you this.

That I really don't mind between the three of us siblings, if I had the choice, I would hope the best for both of you and opt for the worst to befall me. The sucky family problems? Give me. The problematic spouse? Mine. The unrest in both your mind? I'd take. All the negativity in you? Pass it to me. I can take this sort of shit and still make a light in the future.

I know we grew all grew up together and somewhat have the same family background but perhaps it's just my personality. Gifted to tolerate and transmute shit into peace. I've the self belief that tomorrow is always a better day.

If all that gives peace to my mind, I would.

Let me sleep in peace.

All the above is true and I understand the interpretation of it is individualistic.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ah, I'm married? Who is that guy??